Part of His Pack
by Mrs.DracoStyles
Summary: When Edward leaves Bella, he leaves her damaged. She becomes ill and irrational. After an incident Charlie sends her to live with her cousin Scott and his mom Melissa McCall. While there she finds out Scott is a werewolf, Alison is a hunter, and Derek is the Alpha. Bella just can't lead a normal life. Starts mid New Moon and beginning Season 2. Rated T for slight violence.
1. Chapter 1

Three days. I hadn't seen Edward in three days. He dropped me off at house after my birthday party disaster. I hadn't seen Alice or any of the other Cullen's in three days. I had a worried feeling in the pit of my stomach. It wasn't the worry I usually experienced. Like when I was studying for a test or being introduced to someone new. This wasn't a vague sense of anticipation. This was a gnawing sensation in my stomach. It made my skin crawl and my breath short.

"Bella, are you alright?" Charlie asked me while I was eating breakfast this morning. This morning I was starving, I felt hungrier than I ever had before. I had already gone through three blueberry Poptarts.

I nodded breaking apart my fourth one and plopping a big chunk into my mouth. I swallowed. "Yeah, just really hungry."

"I've never seen you eat so much. You have a small appetite for an even smaller girl."

"Guess I'm just hungry today."

"By the way, Edward called this morning." Charlie mentioned into his breakfast. Thought he'd just slip that in slyly did he?

"He did?" I asked as the second piece of Poptart slipped through my fingers and landed on the floor.

Charlie looked at me disapprovingly. "He said he's going to meet you here after school."

"Great." I smiled happily. I stood up picked the Poptart off the floor and put my plate in the sink.

"I don't like how much power this boy has over you, Bells." Charlie said seriously as he did the same. "For three days the boy ignores you and you mope around the house and the second he calls you're ecstatic.

"I wouldn't call it ecstatic." I muttered.

"Bella." Charlie said more seriously.

"Dad, I'm going to be late for school. We'll talk about it later." I said swinging my backpack over my shoulder and giving Charlie a quick peck on the cheek before running out the door.

School passed quickly that day. The sense of worry was gone and was replaced with a sense of eager expectation.

Before I knew it I was home. I expected to see Edward's shiny Volvo in the driveway but it was missing. The person himself however was standing by the door.

I quickly parked the car and jumped out. My brief sense of happiness disappeared. The look on his face was guarded but grim.

"Hey Edward." I said cautiously as I approached him.

He was silent for a long moment and then said in an unemotional voice, "Come for a walk with me." Without waiting for a response he took my hand and started walking towards the forest.

A walk? He wants to go for a _walk_ in the _forest?_

I expected him to go a few steps into the woods and then let me climb piggy-back style onto him and run. But we didn't we kept walking.

"Edward, where are we going?" I asked when we were well in the forest.

"For a walk." He replied in the same grey voice.

"Is there a destination?"

"Yes, it's not much farther."

It was much farther. I wasn't sure exactly how much time had passed but I estimated at least an hour. I wanted to ask where we were going but I knew he wouldn't answer it. So I focused on trying not to trip on the uneven ground. Suddenly Edward stopped.

"Bella we're leaving."

I took a deep breath. This was acceptable I reminded myself. We couldn't stay in Forks forever. But why now? I was ready to give up everything to be with Edward but why so suddenly?

"Why now? Another year—" I started but Edward turned around and interrupted me. He still had the same grim expression on his face.

"Bella, it's time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and he's claiming thirty-three now. We'd have to start over soon regardless.

His answer confused me. I thought the point of leaving was to let his family live in peace. Why did we have to leave if they were going? I stared at him, trying to understand what he meant.

He stared back coldly.

With a roll of nausea, I realized I'd misunderstood.

"When you say we—," I whispered.

"I mean my family and myself." Each word separate and distinct.

I shook my head back and forth mechanically, trying to clear it. He waited without any sign of impatience. It took a few minutes before I could speak.

"Okay," I said. "I'll come with you."

"You can't, Bella. Where we're going…it's not the right place for you."

"When you are is the right place for me."

"I'm no good for you, Bella."

"Don't be ridiculous." I wanted to sound angry, but it sounded like I was begging. "You're the very best part of my life."

"My world is not for you, Bella." He said grimly.

"What happened with Jasper—that was nothing, Edward! Nothing!"

"You're right," he agreed. "It was exactly what was to be expected."

"You promised! In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay—"

"As long as that was best for you," He interrupted to correct me.

"No! This is not best for me!" I said my voice rising.

He took a deep breath and stared, unseeingly, at the ground for a long moment. His mouth twisted the tiniest bit. When he finally looked up, his eyes were different, harder—like liquid gold had frozen solid.

"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." He spoke the words slowly and precisely, his cold eyes on my face, watching as I absorbed what he was really saying.

There was a pause as I repeated the words in my head a few times, sifting through them for their real intent.

"You…don't…want me?" I tried out the words, confused by the way they sounded, placed in that order.

"No." I stared uncomprehending, into his eyes. He stared back without apology. His eyes were like topaz—hard and clear and very deep. I felt I could see into them for miles and miles, yet nowhere in their depths could I see a contradiction to the words he'd spoken.

"Well, that changes things." I was surprised by how calm and reasonable my voice sounded. It must be because I was so numb. I couldn't realize what he was telling me. It still didn't make any sense.

He looked away into the trees as he spoke again. "Of course, I'll always love you….in a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that it's time for a change. Because I'm…_tired_ of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I am not human." He looked back, and the icy planes of his perfect face were not human. "I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't." my voice was just a whisper now; awareness was beginning to seep through me, trickling like acid through my veins. "Don't do this."

He stared at me and I could already see from his eyes that my words were far too late. He already had.

Something in my stomach stirred. Like a snake uncoiling itself, ready to strike. My blood rushed and I felt a painful sensation in my chest. Like something was being stabbed, and then cut into pieces and ripped out of my body. I realized it was my heart. My heart physically _hurt_.

"If…this is what you want."

He nodded once.

"I will make you a promise," Edward said turning his face upwards to the cloudy sky. "I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if I never existed."

I didn't know if this statement required a response. I felt like if I opened my mouth I would break out in sobs and I wouldn't cry in front of Edward. I wouldn't be begging and crying the last time he ever saw me.

He smiled gently. "Don't worry. You're human—your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind."

"And your memories?" I asked. It sounded like there was something stuck in my throat, like I was choking.

"Well"—he hesitated for a short second—"I won't forget. But my kind…we're very easily distracted." He smiled; the smile was tranquil and it did not touch his eyes.

He took a step away from me. "That's everything, I suppose. We won't bother you again."

The plural caught my attention. That surprised me.

"Alice isn't coming back," I realized out loud. My chest felt a little heavier. As though the grief of my bestfriend leaving me was weighing me down.

He shook his head slowly, watching my face.

"No they're all gone. I stayed behind to tell you good-bye."

"Alice is gone?" My voice was blank with disbelief.

"She wanted to say goodbye, but I convinced her that a clean break would be better for you."

I was dizzy; it was hard to concentrate. His words swirled around in my head, and I heard the doctor at the hospital in Phoenix, last spring, as he showed me the X-rays._ You can see it's a clean break_, his finger traced along the picture of my severed bone. _That's good. It will heal more easily, more quickly._

I tried to breathe normally. I needed to concentrate.

"Goodbye, Bella," he said in the same quiet, peaceful voice.

"Wait!" I choked out the word. He couldn't be leaving me like this. Just leaving me here all alone?

"Take care of yourself," he breathed. He leaned down, and pressed his lips very lightly to my forehead for the briefest instant. My eyes closed.

There was a light unnatural breeze. My eyes flashed open. The leaves on a small vine maple shuddered with the gentle wind of his passage.

He was gone.

My heart was in more pain than ever. My breath was shallow and uneven and my chest was burning. Tears spilled over and wracked sobs started. I sat down on the earth and put my head in my hands.

Break-ups suck.

Vampire break-ups suck even more.

There was a clap of thunder and it started raining. I rubbed my eyes. No reason to sit here forever. He's not coming back.

I stood up and before I could take a step anywhere I realized I had absolutely no idea where I was. Edward had left me alone in the middle of the forest.

His name made my chest hurt. It was cloudy and dark now, not to mention extremely wet.

I couldn't remember which way was nearest to the house so I started walking in the direction which had the least amount of trees. After a few minutes of walking I fell down and scraped my knee. Blood gushed out and I tried to stand up but it hurt too much and I fell back down.

"Alright, Bella. Don't panic you're almost home." I tried telling myself.

With more force I pushed myself back up and started limping home. It hurt severely whenever I put any pressure on my leg so I took frequent breaks. Just when I thought the rain was letting up there was a sharp flash of lightning and I screamed and jumped back. My leg wouldn't support me and I fell backwards hitting my head on something hard.

The last thing I was alert of was the fact I smelled blood before I lost consciousness.

Chapter 1! This is an idea that's been floating around in my head for a few days. I LOVE Teen Wolf. It's my favorite show. I love how well written the characters are and how realistic it is. I'm not fond of Twilight. I think it's a good concept but I think Stephanie Meyer wasn't able to write it out well. Most of her characters seem only half-finished. I like playing with her characters and trying to fill them in how I would write them. Anyway! Hope you liked it! I'll try to update tomorrow!


	2. Chapter 2

"Bella? Bella, are you okay?"

"Is she alive?"

"Yeah, there's a pulse but there's blood all over her."

I dimly heard voices through a haze in my head. My eyes were closed and the back of my head had a dull throbbing pain.

"Bella, wake up." I heard the voice again. Slightly louder this time.

"Maybe we should just carry her back." The second voice asked.

"I don't want to move her. I'm afraid of hurting her head."

"She needs a doctor Sam."

The voices were too loud to ignore now. Slowly I opened my eyes. Two dark skinned men stood next to me. They were very tall and had short hair. They hadn't noticed I was awake yet. They were arguing in another language I didn't recognize.

I started to sit up then the world started spinning and I let out a faint groan and put my head in my hands.

"Bella!" One of the men said immediately bending over me and lifting my head up with his hands.

"Are you okay?" The other one asked.

"Fine, just a little dizzy." I mumbled reaching my hand to the back of my head. When I pulled it back it was covered in blood.

"Ewww." I said aloud.

"Yeah, ew. Uck, Sam blood makes my stomach hurt." The other boy complained.

"Suck it up Jared." Sam said and turned back to me. "Bella how did this happen to you? Have you been hurt?"

"Yeah." I said wondering why he would be asking this. I'm bleeding in the middle of the forest.

"Who hurt you?" Sam asked again. He was speaking very slowly as though I wouldn't be able to understand him if he talked fast.

Who hurt me? "I did."

Jared raised his eyebrows. "You hurt yourself."

I rolled my eyes. "It was an accident. I fell and scraped my knee and then a flash of lightning scared me and I fell back and hit my head." I looked behind me and saw a rock smeared with blood. "On a rock."

"Smooth." Jared smirked.

"Shut up, Jared." Sam said.

"How did you find me?" I asked suddenly wondering why two men were wandering around the forest at night. And how they knew my name.

"After you didn't come back home Charlie sent out a search party." Jared said. "Cullen called and mentioned you were going out for a walk." His face all of a sudden darkened. As though the thought of the Cullen's made him mad.

It certainly made me mad. He left me out alone in the middle of the forest and then called Charlie and _lied_ to him?

"What do you mean when I didn't come home? What time is it?" I asked looking around. The forest was pitch black and there were no sounds except for us. Jared was holding a flash light and looking around me as though looking for clues.

"It's almost four a.m." Sam told me.

"Four a.m.?" I gasped. I had left with Edward right after school.

"Yes, Charlie will be worried, we should get you home."

"Yes, we should." I nodded. I stood up except there was a blinding pain in my knee and I gasped and fell back down.

"My knee." I moaned.

Sam bent over me and poked my knee.

"Ouch." I complained.

"I don't think it's broken, just a sprain."

"Great." I said sarcastically.

"I'll have to carry you." He said matter-of-factly. Before I could argue he scooped me up in his arms and him and Jared started walking. I had no idea how they could see anything in this light but they seemed to know exactly where they were going.

I kept the entire time. I was too tired to say anything and my head hurt. I must have hit it pretty hard. Sam and Jared stayed quite the whole time as well and after a while I heard a lot of voices and saw lights through the trees. We broke out of the trees and I saw that we were in my backyard, there were a lot of people in little groups with lamps and Charlie stood in the middle of it.

"Charlie! We've got her!" Sam called loudly. Charlie spun around and when he saw me he panicked and ran towards me.

"Bella, honey, are you all right?" Charlie asked gently touching my face.

"Why is she covered in blood?" He demanded.

"She fell down and might have sprained her knee and she hit her head on a rock and passed out."

"Bella what were you doing out there?" Charlie asked.

"I can't remember." I lied. I didn't want Charlie to know.

"Let's get her inside." Someone suggested. Charlie nodded and Sam carried me into the house. He gently laid me down on the couch.

"Bella?" A new voice asked. I looked at the gray-haired man leaning over me.

"Dr. Gerandy?" I mumbled.

"That's right, dear," he said. "Sam says you're hurt."

"My knee and my head."

"Mmm." He murmured. He sat me up and pulled out supplies from his briefcase and started working on the back of my head.

"You hit your head pretty hard. I'm stitching it up right now and then I'll look at your knee."

"Okay." I mumbled. Dr. Gerandy had injected me with some numbing medicine so I couldn't feel what he was doing.

"Bella, sweetie are you sure you don't remember anything?" Charlie asked sitting down next to me. He had dark shadows under his eyes and he was still in his Sheriff uniform.

"No. Not really."

"What do you remember?" Dr. Gerandy.

"I remember coming home from school and then nothing else." I told them. I decided that was the safest place to leave off. What I wouldn't give to not remember _him_ telling me that I wasn't good enough for him.

"Amnesia is fairly common with head injuries. You may get your memories back over the next few days."

'Already got them,' I thought

Dr. Gerandy told me that I might have a concussion and that Charlie should wake me up every forty-five minutes. He told me to sleep on the couch tonight and to exercise my knee carefully tomorrow. Charlie walked him and a few other people out the door. Including Sam and Jared. I sat up waiting for Charlie. I knew he would want to talk about this. Soon enough he walked back into the room looking more tired than ever. He sat down on the couch next to me and pulled me in close for a hug. I leaned my bandaged head against his chest.

"Bella sweetie, I'm sorry this had to happen to you."

"It's okay." I mumbled.

"I talked to Edward. I called him after I couldn't find you. He said you two broke up?"

I shuddered and started crying. It hurt so badly. My chest was in excruciating pain and hot tears streamed down my face. My face burned with embarrassment and my breath was short and there didn't seem to be enough air in the room.

"Shhh, Bella. I know, I know. It'll get better. I promise. It'll get better."

**End of Chapter 2! I know the story is moving slowly but it will pick up. There will only be a few more chapters of Bella in Forks and then comes the Teen Wolf. I'll try to update tomorrow afternoon but I have a red carpet premiere in the evening so I don't know whether I can promise it or not. And I have to update Life Unexpected soon since I haven't since my computer broke. I'm using my mom's right now and I just got permission to use her computer since she's very protective of it. Anyway, follow and review!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Shhh, Bella. I know, I know. It'll get better. I promise. It'll get better." Charlie had told me that night. It didn't get better. It got worse. It got a lot worse.

I stayed home from school the days afterward. My head healed fast and the sprain only lasted for a few days. But there was the heartbreak to deal with. I had never had a boyfriend before. Most girls dealt with this stuff when they were 13. They dated a boy for two weeks and after they broke up would eat a carton of ice cream and watch sappy movies. I was 16, and I had dated a 107 year-old boy for half a year. And we had been through so much together, much more than any normal couple.

Nothing made me feel better. I felt as if someone had died. I moved through the motions of doing things not really understanding. I tried to get over him. I didn't want to be hung up on him my entire life. But I couldn't. There was something tying me to him. Forbidding me to lead my own life.

And then there was the sickness.

I didn't notice anything at first. I was making dinner one night and when I put the potatoes in the pot and waited for the water to boil, I got an agonizing pain in my head. I fell to the floor clutching my head. I shut my eyes tight and shuddered. It felt like a great black cloud had come over me and created a storm of pain. I threw my head back and screamed. It felt like an eternity and then abruptly stopped. When I shakily stood up, the water hadn't even begun to warm yet.

It wasn't just that one time. They kept coming. Out of nowhere they come and put my under tormenting pain and then they would disappear leaving nothing but a faint squeezing pain around my brain to let me know they existed at all.

It wasn't just headaches either.

I was having pains in my stomach and my chest. It felt like someone had taken a dull blade and cut a hole in my chest and yanked it out. It made breathing demanding and a lot of effort. I started having asthma attacks. I'd never had so much as a couch allergy in my life. Little things started setting me off. Perfume a girl wore from five lockers down started a fit. Charlie bought me an inhaler. Those things saved lives.

I lost weight. I was never a plump person. I was always a healthy weight but now my ribs showed clearly. Jessica and Lauren had started a rumor that I was anorexic when I was changing for gym class. It was true I guess. I never ate. Food repulsed me. The smell of it was enough to send me rushing into the bathroom to puke.

My life was becoming a chore.

And then there was James.

Edward had taken me to play baseball with his family. During the middle of the game, Alice got a vision of three vampires coming, and they posed a threat to me since I was a human. The leader of the coven was named James. I guess you could say he took a liking to me. Or rather the fact that I had a body-guard of seven vampires. He took the situation as a game, and I was the target. He started a hunt. Edward took me back to the house and put me in a car with Alice and Jasper. We tried to throw him off our trail by leading him up north to Canada while I was in Phoenix. He followed the rest of the Cullen's half-way before realizing his mistake and then came to Phoenix. I received a call from James, he had fooled me, and I rushed to meet him at my old dance studio thinking he had my mother. When I arrived I was first met with relief that he didn't have my mother. I could have died happy.

That's when the fight started. James could have just killed me. But he had to do it his way. He taunted me. He was still going after Edward and his family. The fact that they would be hurt ate away at me. He then pushed me down on the floor and stepped on my leg breaking it in half. He threw me into a mirror, and my skin cut and left scrapes. He lifted me up and threw me onto the floor breaking my ribs.

And then he bit me.

I've been bitten by a dog before. Teeth are sharper than you realize. A normal human has the power to bite off their own tongue. Vampire teeth are sharper. It felt like knifes were shoved just above my wrist. Blood spurted out and an overwhelming sense of pain came over me. Then his venom coursed through my veins. Flames were burning every inch of me, making me incoherent. Just when I thought I couldn't stand it anymore, Edward, Carlisle, Jasper, Emmett, and Alice burst into the room. Alice and Carlisle started working on my other injuries and Edward put his mouth on the bite and sucked the venom out. Emmett and Jasper ripped apart James and burned him. They killed him. He was gone.

So why was I seeing him?

I was panting on the couch after having an asthma attack, the TV. was on playing some show I didn't know with a bunch of shirtless guys when a cold, evil, amused voice asked from the corner,

"Having an Asthma Attack or are all those boys getting to you?"

I screamed and spun around.

James was sitting on the Lazy-Boy Charlie occupied every night. He was wearing a gray shirt and blue jeans. Aside from the clothes he looked exactly the same as when I last saw him. Long blonde hair in a braid, cold pale skin, and red eyes. He smiled broadly at me as though I was a long-lost friend that he hadn't seen in a long time.

I continued to scream and backed up on the couch, as though I would be safer if I was a few inches farther.

"Oh please stop that, Bella." James said scrunching up his face as though he swallowed something sour. "You have no idea how long I've been trapped. I don't want to hear you scream."

"Funny," I spat out. "That was the only thing you wanted from me in Phoenix. That and killing me."

James made a tsk noise. "Now, now, Bella. Still hung-up on that? Can't we forgive and forget?"

I jumped off of the couch and backed into the wall. "How are you here? You died! I saw! You were torn apart and burned! You don't come back from something like that."

James made another face. "Yes, your friends made sure I wouldn't be able to reform. That body is gone. Never to return." He said bitterly.

"Then how are you here?" I asked. I started gasping and my hand tightened on my inhaler.

"I'm part of you Bella." James told me in a voice that one would connect with a College Lecture.

"What do mean you're part of me?" I asked disgusted, as he stood up and started pacing around the room although keeping his distance from me.

"My venom was poured inside you Bella. Even though, Edwin was his name? No, Edward. Edward sucked it out of you so that you wouldn't become a vampire; there are still traces of it inside your brain. You see Bella, I'm not truly here. I'm part of your mind."

I took a moment to register this. "So you're not really here? You're just my imagination?"

James smiled. "Not exactly. If I was just your imagination you could just close your eyes and wish me away like a fairy-tale. Go ahead try." He said, his eagerness making me sick to my stomach.

I would do anything to get rid of him so I leaned against the wall and closed my eyes. Imagining James wasn't there with all my heart. I carefully opened my eyes. He was gone. I smiled and let out a breath.

"Yes, your living room is very nice, isn't it?" A voice said in my ear. I screamed and slid down the wall and looked to my left where James was. He didn't leave he was just hiding.

"Bella, I've been stuck in your head for months. I just got out after weeks of wrecking your body to weaken your mind, so I could appear. It wasn't easy. Being stuck in the back our head, listening to your adolescent drama. Math test this, English test that, rumors around school, blah, blah, blah. Really Bella, Hell can't be worse than being stuck in your mind."

"You were killed months ago. Why are you here now?" I whispered clutching my head in my hands seconds away from crying.

"Well, Bella, you were affected by the Vampire bite. You didn't notice that you were becoming more vampire like, not quite a full vampire, more like a half-vampire half-human hybrid. The vampire part of you was feeding off Edward, and the rest of the Cullen's. While the human part of you was genuinely in love with him. Your vampire side was feeding off him like a parasite. When he left you were suddenly cut off from his aura. Ripped from your drug."

"I'm going through withdrawal?" I asked sitting back against the wall. James was still right next to me.

"Yes, you could call it that." He said in a happy voice, as though I was a student who answered a difficult question.

"Will it stop?" I whispered, scared. I caught a glimpse of myself and James in the mirror. My hair was down and had a greasy unflattering shine. I had dark shadows underneath my eyes and my skin had a sickly, yellow tinge.

"No. I'll be with you forever."

"And if I die?"

"You are dying. Your system isn't used to this. It's destroying you. I'm surprised you've hung on this long. Your mind is strong if everything else is weak. However I wouldn't give you more than a few weeks."

"And when we die?"

"You die Bella. I won't. You see I need a new body.

I nodded slowly, swallowing. "You want my body."

James let out a loud, laugh. "Of course not, Bella! Look at you! Who would want your body? You're my unfortunate host. I'm only a thing of the mind right now. I need a _good_ body. Soon enough, I'll be able to break through your mind completely. I'll find a new body and pour myself into him. I'll be a vampire again, I'll find Victoria and I'll be able to be myself again. You'll be dead by then."

"You're insane. I'm not going to let that happen. If I have to keep you a prisinor in my head forever, then I will." I yelled jumping and backing away from him. He had a smirk on his face and he stood up and slowly walked up to me. He put both his hands on my cheeks. He hands didn't feel like they were in my head. They felt so real. I shuddered with disgust.

"You can't stop me. Look at yourself. You can't even take care of yourself." He whispered, he leaned his face closer to mine and put his lips on my cheek for a soft kiss. "It's pathetic."

"Bella?" Charlie's voice called through the house.

James smirked and took a few steps back from me, and then suddenly, he wasn't there at all.

"Bella?" Charlie asked again as he walked into the living room to find me standing in the middle of the room looking like I'd seen a ghost.

"Yeah, dad?" I whispered, probably freaking him out even more. My voice was hoarse.

"Are you feeling okay?" Charlie asked leaning against the door and crossing his arms.

"I'm fine. Just thought I saw something." I told him, before giving him a fake smile and heading upstairs to my room. James was right. I couldn't take care of myself.

**Cliffy! Kind of. It's like a crappy cliff-hanger. It's a crappy chapter but I had to get it out of the way. There should only be one more chapter till Bella moves to Beacon Hills. And the James thing is real. It's not just Bella going insane. It's like in Season Four of Heroes where Sylar is stuck in Matt's head. Sorry if I just spoiled that for you. I'm super sorry for not updating in a while, but I was busy. Lame excuse, and I bet a bunch of you just spit on your computer screen. But, my dance school is two hours away and I have to be there at least an hour before class. I'm a ballerina! So yeah, I have a busy schedule. I'm not sure when I can update again but it should be before Christmas.**


	4. Chapter 4

It was two days after James had first showed up. I had spent the last two days wondering what I was going to do. I was dying. There wasn't much I knew about that. After thinking of dumb ideas for 42 hours, I broke down googled how to stop it. The top results where a bunch of anti-depression websites. James was still hanging around, but after 42 hours of him popping in-or-out it became less of a fear and more of an annoyance.

There wasn't much to my life anymore. I didn't see much point to even getting out of bed anymore, but I needed to get rid of James. I couldn't let him back into the world and let him track other game.

"Humans really are boring." James said in a dull voice. He was sitting on my desk in my bedroom studying his fingernails.

"Shut up, I'm trying to kill you."

James laughed. "Like I said Bella. I can't die."

"You have before." I said through gritted teeth.

"Being burned alive does that to you. You should try setting yourself on fire."

"That might work." I said slowly.

James looked surprised. "You're not serious are you?"

"It's an idea."

"You're a strange human."

"So, I've been told." I said grumpily, jumping up and rummaging through my bedside table drawer.

After pushing through the old contents of the drawer I found what I was looking for. An old razor that I had broken when I dropped a stereo on it. I broke two things that day.

The razor was dull. This would hurt. I shifted my weight from foot-to-foot, steeling myself. With a deep breath I pushed the blade into my wrist.

'Crap, this hurt.' I mentally thought. I took another breath. I've been through worse than this.

Carefully I pushed in deeper into my skin. The skin broke and blood started gushing out. The sight of blood made me shudder.

"Mmm, delicious looking." James said, almost sadly.

"Shut up." I said through my teeth.

"What exactly are you doing?" James asked, as I carefully traced the blade around my left hand, around the scar James had left, that started this whole mess.

"Cutting you out." I whispered, in a low moan. It was freaking hurting.

The blood was really spouting now, and I was just re-tracing around the scar. I tried digging into to the actual bite mark, but it just bent the blade. I tried applying more pressure and the blade pressed into my fingers.

Blood was now dripping onto the carpet leaving a stain I'm sure I wouldn't be able to get out.

The blade bent even more, pushing into my fingers, and made no effect to the scar, and I threw the blade across the floor, gasping. I fell onto my bed and started to cry.

"You think a dull blade would manage to even dent the strongest granite in the world?" James asked smugly.

I have him a look of absolute hatred, before turning on my heel and heading to the bathroom. When I arrived James was leaning against the sink, I told him to shut his eyes, which he did by covering them like a two year old playing hide-and-seek, and then I stripped and jumped into the shower.

The blood looked even worse running down my bare legs, and splattering against the walls. I had to take deep breaths not to pass out. It looked like a horror movie.

After I finished scrubbing all traces of blood from my body I got out of the shower and patched up my wound. It made me frustrated to go through all that pain and not even have a scratch on the damn scar.

"Well it was a good effort." James said with mock sympathy, his hands still covering his eyes.

"That was attempt number one." I told him firmly.

The pain in my arm lasted for days afterwards. It made my arm stiff and hard to move. And it had all been for nothing.

James was still here, and it was driving me into a corner. I would spend Spanish class trembling while James whispered in my ear. I had to swerve to avoid hitting another car when James unexpectedly popped into the car and got in my line of vision.

Before I was just in a dull haze, with occasional blaring pain. But now with the constant paranoia, jumpiness and crazy actions, I was really starting to worry that I was actually going crazy.

I needed to think of different ways to get rid of James. Physical harm wouldn't do it. I needed something else.

My car had decided to not work today so I was walking home from school. For the moment I was free of James, which suited me just fine. It was nice to be free of him for the moment, although it was annoying not knowing when he was going to come back.

My thoughts were interrupted by a loud shout of laughter coming from some guys hanging by the side of the road. They were passing around a bottle of vodka.

Perfect. A nice way to take the edge off. I headed over to them quickly. They stopped and sized me up.

"Watcha you want?" A tall boy with blonde hair asked. He was a senior at Forks High. Tim, or Tom I think was his name.

"A drink." I told them truthfully.

"Cool, a chick." An unfamiliar guy said. He was the tallest of the group and had dark brown skin. I think he was from the Indian Reservation close to here. "We could have some fun with her." He suggested slyly.

"Shut up Paul, she's chief Swan's daughter." A boy in my grade with ginger hair hissed at him. "She could be a nark."

"Relax, I just need to take a shot or two." I told him rolling my eyes.

"A light-weight like you? I could see it." The boy named Paul said with a smirk.

"I say we let her." Tim or Tom said.

"I second that." Paul put in. "Two against one. Bad luck."

"Fine." The ginger one said and handed me the bottle.

I took a swig and coughed while the guys laughed. I'd never had strong alcohol before. I'd had champagne twice before at a wedding, and Renee's friend Ally gave me some kind of fruity cocktail before that left me with a headache.

"Careful there." Paul said grabbing the bottle. "Don't want to over-do-it too quickly. It'll ruin the fun."

"Yeah, because this is a blast."

"After a few more drinks it will be." The ginger guy promised me.

When the bottle got to me a second time, I took a smaller sip. The alcohol burned my throat but I didn't care. By the third time I was learning how much to take in, and by the fourth time I was a pro. The fifth and sixth I executed perfectly and the seventh I was a little sloppy. The eighth I managed to hold onto, and the ninth I almost lost my grip on the bottle and I let out a small scream of laughter. God, it felt good to laugh.

"Woah there, careful." Paul said as I stumbled.

"Yeah, don't want to take a header into the gutter." Tom said, we all laughed. God, Tom was hilarious.

"Next time we should light up a joint at the same time." Gingy suggested. That's what I called him.

"Awesome!" I said a little too loud. "Let's do it now!"

I jumped to show my excitement and stumbled to the side. Paul caught me and steadied me.

"I think you might be done." He laughed.

"What, no! No, I'm fine." I told him trying to get out of his grip but I almost fell and threw my arms around his neck, facing him. "You have pretty eyes."

"That's not all that's pretty." He told me with a smirk.

"Hey, lay off man. She's wasted." Gingy told him.

"Ah shut it. She's fine."

"Careful dude. Dangerous waters. Ha, wonder what it would be like if water were all vodka." Tom said with a lop-sided grin.

"That'd be awesome!" I told him fervently. I broke out of Paul's grip and stretched my arms out wide and the wind brushed me forward.

"Oh my god! Guys I'm flying!" I screamed.

"Okay, I'll take her home." Paul told everyone. I felt his arms wrap around me and he dragged me home.

"Oh, Paul I'm fine!" I told him as I patted his lower back.

"Little low, Bella." Paul said amused.

"Oh, woops." I said laughing loudly. "I'm sorry for touching your butt Paul!"

"Sshhh, Bella! Your neighbors are right there." He hissed in my ear. His voice was low.

"Oh sorry. I'm sorry Mrs. Frankson! I didn't mean to touch Paul's butt you see!" I yelled to my neighbor who was painting her fence. She gave us disapproving looks and gave huff and straightened her flowered hat.

"Oh God." Paul said as he laughed into my shoulder.

"Hey, Paul we're at my house!" I said excitedly. "I live here!"

"God, you're awesome when you're drunk."

"Am I drunk?" I asked. I felt light-hearted and free. If this was drunk, than I liked it.

"Yes. Yes you are." Paul told me as he led me to my door. "Keys?"

"They're in my pocket." I told him.

Paul raised his eyebrows and grinned. "Well, then I'm going to have to get them."

Paul pulled me forward and put his hand in my back-pocket. Warm tingles spread through my body. I felt a flutter in my stomach and my heart started to pound.

"There we are." Paul said pulling the keys out. He jammed it in the door and pulled me into the house.

"So, this is the Chief's house," Paul said leading me to the living room.

"You know my dad?" I asked changing directions to the stairs.

"We've had the pleasure of a few run-ins."

"My room is upstairs." I told. I might need help with these stairs. "Help me up?"

His grin got bigger. "Sure."

I led him straight to my room and plopped onto my bed still laughing. Paul sat down next to me and brushed my hair to the side.

"Your eyes are a pretty color. Like caramel." I told him slowly. My words were becoming low and slurred.

"Yeah." He breathed, he leaned into my neck and gave a light kiss on my neck. I stiffened.

"You okay?" he asked brushing my hair back.

I didn't say anything. I was stunned. My brain wasn't moving as fast as it usually did. I wanted to talk to him but my mouth was too heavy.

Paul pulled back and gave me another kiss this time an inch from my lips. My body still didn't move. My brain was still shut off.

"Fine." Paul breathed and he pulled away. "If you ever feel up to it though, I'm just a call away." He gave me one more smirk and left the room.

I started to breathe again, but no thoughts came my way. A knot formed in my stomach and I laid down and turned onto my side and closed my eyes.

When I woke up it was dark out, I sat up thinking I'd go get a glass of water and my stomach lurched forward. I ran to the bathroom as fast as I could and the moment I dropped beside the toilet I vomited into the bowl. The sick burned my throat and my head spun.

"Hungover?" James asked, looking at me with disgust.

"Keep your voice down." I moaned laying my head against the cold rim of the toilet.

"Oh God, humans are disgusting." James complained

"Yeah because killing people is pristine."

"At least we don't regurgitate it back up. Alcohol is a poison. Why would you willingly do that to yourself?"

"Maybe because there's a jackass in my head." I complained, and gave another heave.

"Watching you like this is pathetic."

"At least I can be like this. You don't have a body."

"Keep doing this and I will. I felt much stronger while you were running around with those boys today."

I froze. "What do you mean? You weren't even there."

"Yes I was, you were just too drunk to notice."

"You were there," I said slowly, leaning my head back against the toilet.

"Yes."

"I blocked you?"

"You didn't block me. The alcohol prevented you from seeing me. However with you so weak I almost escaped. That one boy would have made a great host. I was planning to take his body but your emotions got in the way." James spat bitterly.

"My emotions?" My heart started to pound. I couldn't believe that James had almost escaped.

"Yes, you really liked him. I was working on taking you out so I could transfer host bodies, when _love _came strongly from you, and prevented me."

I stiffened. "I don't love Paul."

"Strongly attracted then."

"I'm not strongly attracted to Paul."

"If you weren't then I would have been able to kill you and take him."

I started to think. It hurt a lot. I had a major hangover. I had experienced feelings for someone other than Edward. The concept was new to me.

"If you almost took over me when I was drunk then why are you telling me this?" I asked.

James was quite for a moment. "I don't we want to experience love for a teenage boy ever again."

I laughed before puking again.

Ice. Ice is freaking cold.

"Really Bella? This is your plan?" James asked looking amused.

"Shut up." It was a plan. Plans were good.

When I was driving home from school the minute I saw the grocery store I came up with an insane plan. I swerved into the parking lot and rushed inside and bought 3 large bags of ice. The cashier raised her eyebrows but didn't say anything. It wasn't every day in Forks that you saw an anorexic girl who looked like a drug junkie buying up all the ice in the store.

When I got home I quickly turned off the heater. Outside it was already freezing and it didn't take long for the house to drop from 70F to 16F

Running upstairs I filled the bathtub with all of the ice. The marble tub made it colder. I stripped into my underwear, and was steeling myself to get into the tub.

"You know it probably be colder if you were naked." James suggested leaning against the sink.

"I said shut-up."

"Like I've been telling you Bella. You can't control me."

"Then leave." I told him.

"I will. Soon."

"In your dreams. I'm getting rid of you."

James snorted. "You think taking an ice bath will get rid of me? The cold will just feed the vampire side of you, making me stronger."

"No. It'll make _me_ stronger." I corrected him, right before taking the plunge into the tub.

Ice burns. Ice burned into my skin making me gasp. Pins and Needle sensations flooded my body. Something started happening within my body. A writhing snake started to twist and bend through my body lunging for an escape. My body started shaking and the pain was almost unbearable. My mind started to freeze.

Yes. That's what I had been aiming for.

My mind was rapidly fading from consciousness. It felt like I was on a speeding train. I was killing my mind…

"BELLA! WHAT THE HELL?"

I was suddenly thrown back into consciousness. Charlie was standing in the door-way looking furious and James was slunk back against the sink. I hadn't managed to get rid of him but he was faded. He looked like a picture that had been water-damaged. If only I had bathed a few more minutes…

"BELLA!" Charlie's voice boomed again. I jumped this time. Charlie ran towards the tub and plummeted his arms in he pulled me out. Even though it probably wasn't that much warmer in the house after soaking in the ice water I was met with sudden warmth.

"BELLA, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?" Charlie yelled again.

"N-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n" I tried to tell him nothing but my teeth were chattering so bad that I couldn't make out a word.

"Bella do you realize you could have gotten hypothermia and died?" Charlie asked, taking off his Sheriff's jacket and wrapping it around my shoulders and pushing me towards my room, he threw open the door and James was sitting on my desk. He didn't look confident anymore, he still had the half-vanished look and he looked worn-out. The sight of him looked so frail gave me a feeling of success and I resisted the urge to stick my tongue out at him. Half because Charlie would have another reason to institutionalize me and half because I would probably bite my tongue off.

"Stay there, Bella. I'm going to turn the heat back on." Charlie wrapped my large comforter around me and then headed back downstairs.

"That was enlightening." James whispered, hoarse.

"W-w-w-w-w-w-w-a-a-a-a-a-s-s-s-s i-i-i-t-t?" I stuttered pulling the heavy blanket tighter around me. The numbness of the ice-bath was wearing off, and sharp, tight pain was replacing it.

"We almost died, Bella. You obviously haven't experienced death, and we were close. A few minutes longer, we would have been gone."

"W-w-w-w-e-e?" I asked. I had meant to shut down my mind. I wanted to trap him, and when my mind re-awakened I figured I could find a way to keep him there.

"Yes." James said his voice laden with disgust. "I was wrong. You were slipping from your mind. That experience was traumatic enough for you that I'm still only half here. If I want to find another host body then you need to be painfully awake for it."

"I-i-i-w-won't-t-t-le-e-e-t-that-t-ha-p-p-pen." I told him, as sternly as I could muster.

James looked at me. "I'll find a way. I'll be able to overpower you."

"L-look a-t-t y-you. You're barely alive. Living off me. I can make you go away with just ice."

James looked murderous. "You tried. You failed."

"Only because of Charlie." I told him fiercely.

He smirked. "And why is Charlie even here? Why is he home so early?"

That confused me. "I don't know, what you're talking about."

"You called Charlie. Right before you filled the tub. You told him you were planning something crazy and to come home and stop you."

"I didn't do that." I said. I had no memory of the event.

He smiled. "Oh but you did. On your way upstairs? Can you remember walking up the stairs or coming into the house?"

I tried to remember but I couldn't remember anything. It was like a blank slate. Nothing.

"You overpowered me." I whispered, taking in a gasp.

"I couldn't hold it. I held on with every ounce of strength I had, but your mind is too strong." He spat.

"Doesn't matter how strong it is. You were still able to control it."

James had a thoughtful expression on his face. "It was too hard to block you. But I wonder if you saw everything. If I only took over your nervous system."

"What are you talking about?" I asked fear flooding me, colder than the ice.

All of a sudden James disappeared. My body lost feeling. I was no longer in the front seat. I was unceremoniously thrust into the back. I couldn't feel my muscles, I panicked and tried to move my arm, it didn't move, I could see everything through my own eyes, yet I had no control.

Without any feeling on my part my body stood up. I was wearing my green robe now so I wasn't in my underpants. My body left my bedroom and started down the long stairs.

'Closer to Charlie' I thought with a panic.

'JAMES!' I screamed out in my head. There was no answer.

James was right. Being trapped inside my head was horrible. I had a floaty feeling of drifting. It wasn't like I was moving around but whenever I thought of just staying put everything seemed to travel fast. I couldn't speak, and I could barely hold thoughts in my head. I could think about food but if I focused on Pizza I lost my train of thought. The worst part is seeing things and not being able to do anything about it. It felt exactly like I was in a movie theater, first row and telling the main character that she was making the wrong decisions.

My body moved towards the kitchen. My hearing was a low buzz. I couldn't focus on a voice until James did. James heard Charlie talking to someone on the phone in the living room so vaguely I registered that fact.

My body started rummaging through the drawers, my hands fumbling with forks, and seasonings and serving dishes. Then they abruptly stopped when they touched a long sharp steak knife.

'CHARLIE!' My bodiless mind screamed. My body wavered as if my anxiety had almost overthrown it. But my body continued under James control. My hands gripped the knife and started towards the living room. I could hear Charlie talking on the phone. He was seated on the other side of the room, and didn't notice me come in.

"She's not well Dr. Gerandy. She tried to drown herself in ice. She's not been eating—"

"I realize you're not a therapist—"

"Well there must be something you can—"

"No. I'm not going to do that, I'd rather—"

"She won't even leave the house—"

"I've talked to Renee. She's never acted like this before it's like she—"

"Yeah? Well up yours." Charlie yelled slamming the phone onto the receiver. He was red in the face, his eyes were watering and he was breathing heavily. He spun around and stiffened.

"Bella? What are you doing?" Charlie whispered in an extremely quiet voice looking at me with horror.

'RUN!' I mentally screamed but nothing came out of my mouth.

My body advanced slowly to Charlie.

"Bella sweetie. Calm down, drop the knife." Charlie whispered.

My mind launched everywhere desperate to find a way to use my body. It's my body, I thought with all my might.

My body took another step.

'No, oh God, James please no!' I mentally cried.

My body wavered but it kept advancing.

Charlie didn't back up. He stayed exactly where he was. He didn't seem to be looking at the knife. He was staring at my face.

'Stop.' I shrieked out in my head. My body started to tremble but I couldn't move it.

My hands lowered and brought the knife next to my stomach still pointing at Charlie.

Getting my body back wasn't working. I focused solely on my hands, they started to tremble.

'Turn the blade around.' I thought gravely.

The knife slowly moved towards my stomach.

Charlie's eyes grew wide.

"No, Bella. No stop." Charlie commanded in a low hurried voice.

'I'm sorry.' I silently wept.

I couldn't let James kill Charlie. Even if it meant my own life.

The knife was barely an inch from my stomach, when all of sudden I was thrown back into my body.

I gasped loudly and dropped the knife on the floor. I fell backwards and started crying loudly.

I expected Charlie to run and leave but instead he ran towards me and pulled me into him.

"Bella." He breathed into my hair.

"Daddy." I wept clutching close onto him. I hadn't called him daddy in years.

"Bella, what's wrong?" He asked firmly. It was a simple question with a complicated answer.

"I can't tell you."

"Dammit Bella!" Charlie yelled loudly. He detached himself from me picked me up and pushed me onto the couch.

"Bella, you've been keeping secrets from me since you moved here! And I've had it!" He screamed almost hysterically.

"Dad," I started.

"NO! Bella, I'm doing the talking!" He paused and took a calming voice and started talking in a stern low voice.

"Bella, when you first moved here you were normal! You were shy, sure, but then you started hanging out with those Cullen's! I thought it would be good for you hanging out with people your age but then you started keeping secrets. Don't say you didn't," Charlie said as I attempted to interrupt.

"I know you did, going to Port Angeles with Jessica and coming back with Edward. Lying about where you were, and running away? Bella, I still don't understand what happened! You were fine and happy and then you came back and threw a fit and screamed at me and drove all the way to Phoenix! And I don't believe you were alone. I know those Cullen kids had something to do with it!"

"And Bella, you fell out of a window, broke your leg, fractured your wrist, hit your head and cut yourself deeply. On the same day your dance studio mysteriously burns down."

My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe Charlie had figured it out.

"I'm not an idiot Bella." Charlie growled. "You were checked into the hospital an hour before the Police found the wreckage of your fall. At the time I was so relieved that you were okay, that I didn't ask. But Bella, I'm asking you now. What happened that day?"

I shivered. I desperately wanted to tell Charlie everything but I couldn't. I couldn't put him in anymore danger than he was already in.

I kept quit. Charlie gave me a disappointed look and continued on.

"You came back even though you left. You got back together with Edward after breaking up with him, and acted like everything was normal and perfect. Then they left." He paused and gaged my reaction.

I was extremely still.

"Bella, it's not normal. I haven't seen anything like this. When your mom left me…it wasn't pleasant. I had my tough times too, but not like this."

He looked at me. "The constant sickness, not eating, Bella I saw you today, you're too skinny. You're like a skeleton. Your nightmares. Every night you wake up screaming Bella. You don't talk, you don't laugh, you don't do anything. Bella I see how much pain you're in. It kills me." Charlie's voice was strained and he sat down next me.

"Dad, I'm sorry—" I started reaching out to him. He took my hand in his and patted it.

"I don't want sorry Bells, I want you to get better."

"I'm trying."

"No you're not. Especially lately." Charlie reached into his Police bag and pulled out a plastic Ziploc bag. Inside was a bloody dull razor.

"Oh." I said suddenly realizing. "No, dad I wasn't—"

"Just like you weren't drinking vodka the other day?" Charlie asked grimly.

"Dad," I started.

"Bella, I've tried. I've done everything I can think of. I'm at my wit's end. I'm afraid something bad is going to happen to you. Something worse than the cutting, drinking, the ice, and the knife." Charlie's voice cracked.

He took a breath. "I can't risk my bad judgment anymore. Maybe if I had talked to you sooner, tried harder."

"Don't blame yourself dad." I cried clutching his arm.

"I have too. If I had taken better care of you. Renee never had this trouble."

"Are you sending me back to Renee?" I asked, my tears making my face itch.

Charlie fidgeted. "Renee doesn't know what to do either." There was something in the way he said it, and the way he looked. I had seen it before.

"She doesn't want me does she?" I asked stunned. The answer came quick and it made horrible sense.

Charlie gave a look of pity. It was the same look I got when I'd be at my babysitters hours after Renee was supposed to pick me up, the same look I got spending weeks at a time with my grandma because Renee was spending time with her boyfriend. Renee had never really been there for me.

"Bella, I think it would be best if you went to stay with your cousin Scott and Aunt Melissa." Charlie said. I was losing him too.

"You're sending me to California?" I yelled.

"For now. I think Melissa would really be able to help, Bella."

"No!" I couldn't risk putting more people in danger.

"Bella, please. We just want you to get better."

"Charlie, I can't—" I started.

"Well, you're going. And that's final!" Charlie said firmly.

"Dad please don't send me away!" I cried.

"I'm sorry Bella. But I'm of ideas. I need you to do this."

My lips and trembled as I looked over Charlie, his face was pale and tired and his eyes, oh his eyes. They were wet with tears and fear and hopelessness shined. I couldn't stand to hurt Charlie anymore. I ran up the stairs and collapsed onto my bed sobbing, and hating myself for hurting my father.

"Well, it seems we're going on a trip!" James said delightedly. He was sitting in my rocking chair in the corner smiling pleasantly.

"You." I whispered vehemently.

"Me."

"You almost killed Charlie." I spat.

"I didn't want to Bella. Can you imagine me having his body? Bleh. But he wouldn't have been able to hurt me the way you would have. I needed to try Bella. I gave up in the end though."

"I overpowered you."

"You used your hands Bella. I don't think that qualifies for a medal. Once you thought killing yourself Bella I had to give up."

"You're never giving up are you?"

"Never."

James disappeared before I could say anything else. I fell against my bed and started sobbing again.

**An update before Christmas huh? Yeah, I know I suck. I wish I had an explanation like something bad happened to me and I lost the will to write but pretty much a whole lot of good things happened to me and I got busy. I was accepted into a ballet company and was cast in the corps de ballet, so I have classes and rehearsals almost every day and when I don't I have work. So updating has been really hard but I have the next chapter written up so I promise an update tomorrow just because you all deserve it. You've all been so great to me, and I love it. Thank you! **

**P.S. Did you see the little promo during the MTV Awards? It was like 1 minute but it was awesome! (said that in a Stiles voice)**


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